......or why I am even doing it.

Why am I even doing this? I honestly have no fucking idea!!

I've asked myself that so many times over the last several days. ok in my lifetime too, but I've asked it a lot over the last week simply because I want an answer. I want an answer to what is driving me to sit down and hack away at the keyboard, ok kinda because my nails are still super long, and I haven't made a decision there yet. Let me be real, I don't have the energy do to anything with them yet. 

What is making me want to sit here and type out my life, my thoughts, my fears, my feelings, and my soul. Why isn't my hour-long weekly therapy session enough for that? I mean the world is gonna see this. What is this going to help? Is it going to help or is bearing everything that I am gonna hurt me?  Who is gonna take and use every word against me? Who is gonna tell me I am wrong or I dont know what I am talking about. Who is gonna make me feel that I dont matter? 

I am doing this for no one but me because that is what I feel that I need to do. Im doing this so that I have an outlet for my voice. I am doing this so that I may find others that go through the same struggles I do. I am doing it for the person who hasn't done it yet, so they dont have to do it alone.